Kristyn Says…

Many people in this world set themselves goals, and setting goals is a very productive way to live. But there are other people who become so fixated on their goals that they forget to live, and they lose track of the little things in life that are so precious and are not meant to be ignored. Stop and smell the roses your goal will still be there but you have to stop to smell those roses. I’ve had goals, I’ve met certain goals, I’ve changed goals, I’ve failed goals and I’ve given up on goals. But I don’t regret any of them. I’ve seen death and death, to me, is a constant reminder that life is so short and you need to live every moment to the complete fullest. Life is about learning, excelling, and living. Life is about failing, and not always getting what you want, it’s about experiences and succeeding. I know I only have 21 years of experience on this beautiful earth but I have learned so much within this last year than I ever will in my entire existence.

I thought I had everything figured out, I thought I was set. I thought I had a life partner, I had a very promising job and I made what I thought was okay money. I had fun with all of my friends, and I had amazing family. I spent too much money on way too many drinking nights; I planned way too many shopping trips and had way too much fun. But I was happy, I was living and I was free. I thought I was set, but what I didn’t see was that the relationship was doomed from the start, I didn’t have money in my savings account and at the end of the day I didn’t have a career, I had a job. Since then those “best friends” have had babies, moved out west and settled down. What I didn’t know was that my life, the life I was destined to live, was about to hit me in the face, it was just about to begin.  When I look back at how my life was, just a short year ago, I am living a completely different one now, I don’t even know who that person was. I’ve changed so much and opened the doors to a more promising, loving, and secure life.

I broke up with a man that was once everything to me. I learned that a broken heart still continues to beat no matter how damaged you deem yourself to be. I learned that after trying every possible solution, and waiting for something that will never change, I learned that giving everything you have until you are empty inside, I learned that being miserable with the justification of “everything will be okay one day”- is not how you’re supposed to do things. I’ve learned that you will never be happy if you settle for someone who doesn’t deserve you. And most importantly I’ve learned that all wounds mend in time, as long as you allow yourself the time to heal. I wouldn’t change anything for anything. In regards to my job, I loved it. I absolutely and unconditionally loved it. I loved being so useful and working in all departments of the restaurant. I loved how I knew that restaurant like the back of my hand, I loved the expectations and I loved the money and I loved the fun. But I was never meant to cook and deliver peoples food. Life had way more in store for me. I learned that although I loved that job with my entire heart and soul- sometimes you need to challenge yourself to see what you are capable of. Sure I miss it every day but I am doing something way better with my life now, I am serving people in a different way and improving people’s quality of life. I learned that no body in this world should have a job- they should have a career. And like my Grandpa has ALWAYS said: If you love your job; you’ll never have to work a day in your life.  Overall the hardest lesson I was forced to learn, was that sometimes taking a step backwards is not as terrible as it seems. I needed to figure myself out, and get back on my feet. Moving back in with the parents after being on your own is the worst feeling in the world. I was overwhelmed with feelings of failure, doubt, incompetence and it was a hard heavy shot at my self confidence and self worth. However, it was exactly what I needed. Instead of looking at the negative aspects about back tracking, I should have been thinking that I was given a second chance and an opportunity to start over again; and do it right. Most importantly I’ve learned that life is so unpredictable, you miss something every time you blink. Life can change in an instant and you are not supposed to try and prevent change, you’re supposed to embrace it. Cry to those love songs, laugh to those stupid jokes, and sing to that Adele song despite how terrible you sound. Fall in love with opportunity and never be afraid to let someone new into your life. Never talk about people behind their back, ignore jealousy and enjoy the ride of your life, because you only get one!

As I’ve said, my life is completely different from how it was a year ago. I quit my amazing job, left my boyfriend, moved home and went to school. I got over what I thought was going to be one of the hardest things to get over. But I found a man who is more amazing than I could have ever imagined. He was an amazing friend for years and now he is an amazing boyfriend. I wasn’t afraid to let him in, and though we’re moving fast, I’m letting my heart make the decisions. Some people would deem that as a mistake, others would say it’s romantic. Frankly, I don’t care either way. I’m happy and right now in this life, that’s all that matters. I’m watching those flowers on the hill side, and their blooming like crazy, I’m listening to the river flow down the stream and I’m watching children grow. To this current date I am a week away from completing school. I will be a PSW on my long road to starting a career in health care. This is what I’m meant to do. I’ve learned that PSW’s don’t just wipe butts, or feed the ones who can’t feed themselves. PSW’s don’t just change diapers and bath you. PSW’s work every day to improve YOUR grandparents’ quality of life. We, as PSWS, care more about peoples’ well being than anyone else in this field. We work with people every single day and focus on promoting their independence, well being and aim to ensure that during this last stage of life, they are as comfortable as possible, and as happy as they are able to be. I’ve learned more about respect then I have in my entire life. I’ve developed patience, love for a stranger, and appreciation for what I have in my life. I’ve learned that every single person has their own individual story and sometimes it’s sad, and sometimes it’s touching. I’ve witnessed dedication on a whole new level, seeing loved ones come in to visit their mom, dad, wife, or husband every single day and I’ve seen how families get torn apart by life’s flaws. I’ve seen who I was, I’ve witnessed who I am and I know who I want to be. And I am in the driver seat of my own life. I will turn when I feel I need to, I will go back when I’m lonely and I will continue to drive forward regardless of how scary that road may look. But most of all I never drive with a map, because I know roughly where I want to be, and I know I will get there eventually but I am comfortable with knowing that some stops are necessary, and life is a journey; not a destination. That’s how I live my life, that’s how I’ve learned to live my life, and you should too! No regrets; just hope and a little bit of faith. Kristyn says

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